Oh, my dogs!

 













Dear God:
Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?
 
 Dear God:
Why do humans smell the flowers,
but seldom, if ever, smell one another?
  
Dear God:
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch?
Or is it still the same old story?
 
 Dear God:
Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar,
the mustang, the  colt, the stingray, and the rabbit,
but not ONE named for a Dog?
How often  do you see a cougar riding around?
We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename
the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?
 
 Dear God:
If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and
no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?
 
  Dear God:
We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions,
hand signals, whistles,  horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's,
electromagnetic energy fields, and  Frisbee flight paths.
What do humans understand?
  
 Dear God:
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
 
  Dear God:
Are there mailmen in Heaven?
If there are, will I have to apologize?
 
Dear God:
Let me give you a list
of just some of the things
I must remember to be a good Dog.
 
1. I will not eat the cats' food
before they eat it or after they throw it up.
 
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.,
just  because I like the way they smell.
 
3. The Litter Box is not a  cookie jar.
 
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
 
5. The  garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
 
6. I will not play  tug-of-war with
Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
 
7.  Sticking my nose into someone's crotch
is an unacceptable way of saying  'hello'.
 
8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up
when I'm under the coffee table .
 
9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur
before entering the house - not after.
 
10. I will not come in from outside
and immediately drag my butt.
 
11. I will not sit in the middle of the
living room and lick my crotch.
 
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when
I play with him and he makes that  noise,
it's usually not a good thing.
 
P.S.
Dear God:
When I get to Heaven
may I have my testicles back?

From www.blacklabrador.com